Former and longtime Harvard resident Helen Batchelder has just published a novel that she had been working on for 10 years. In a recent conversation, she said she had reached a point in her life where she felt she had to get the book finished. “Up on End and Spinning” is a sprawling story told in the third person from the point of view of Sarah, starting when she was age 6. The reader spins with Sarah through various places, people, and time shifts as she tries to find her sister—and herself.
An early scene of the family driving to Maine for summer vacation reveals personalities and the dynamics of the relationships. It is remindful of a Norman Rockwell illustration, and there is humor, but there is clearly tension and dysfunction here as well. Sarah, her older sister, Laney, and Grandma Bea are in the back seat, with Walter (father) driving and Margaret (mother) in the passenger spot. The adults are loudly discussing a newspaper article about an assault and people they know who are allegedly involved. But none of them is listening to the others. Laney seems a bit tuned in to what’s going on, but the adults aren’t answering her questions. Sarah is oblivious, but when she does say something, Grandma Bea criticizes her sharply. The only positive relationship is that between the two sisters.
The girls’ closeness is further shown in a scene at the beach. When Sarah stubs her toe and Grandma Bea accuses her of never watching where she’s going, Laney is there to defend and comfort Sarah. The scenes between the sisters are delightful in their humor and in the portrayal of Sarah’s innocence and her worship of Laney. For her part, Laney is smart and imaginative and cares deeply about her sister. A near tragedy cements their love for one another.
Too soon the girls grow older, and Laney is off to college. Sarah spins through some years of trying to lose herself through singing gigs. And she engages in some self-destructive actions.Then she finds a job, rents a house for her and her young son, and meets her neighbors. She enters into a relationship with John, a dull, narcissistic man who is very insensitive and judgmental of Sarah. After every exchange between them, the reader wants to shake Sarah and tell her to dump John. But we also see why, being her, she can’t. People and events from the past arise, and Sarah has to put pieces together to make sense of all the connections.
Real characters
Throughout the book, the dialogue is lively and realistic, no easy feat for a writer. The time shifts come mostly without warning, revealing more and more of the backstory. New characters come into play who seem unimportant, but most of them turn out to be relevant to the plot in some way. And they become foils for us to see changes in Sarah. As Sarah gets clues about people and events of the past, she makes some connections that may not yet be clear to the reader. But despite plot intricacies that might be confusing, the characters are interesting, some endearing, and Sarah is always clear and very real.
In “Up on End and Spinning,” Batchelder followed the most basic rule of good writing: Write about what you know. She admitted that the characters are based on real people (In fact, some residents of Harvard make cameo appearances in surprising places) and that the coast of Maine is where her heart is. One of the things she found damaging to her, both as a child and an adult, were the family secrets. “Maybe adults keep secrets so as not to hurt you, but that backfires,” she said. When children don’t understand the reasons for things, they can mistakenly conclude that something is their fault, and insecurity can result. In the book, Sarah left home with so many questions about her parents’ divorce, Grandma Bea’s divorce, and Bea’s constant belittling of her and obvious favoritism toward Laney. It made Sarah believe she was not a good enough person.
Sarah is trapped in a bad relationship, but she puts up with John, perhaps because she thinks in some way she deserves this unhappiness and partly she doesn’t know how to change things. In her work with high school students, assistant teaching and tutoring, Batchelder sensed that it’s not uncommon for young women to feel themselves unworthy. “I wanted to show that you don’t have to feel pressure to be in a relationship. And you don’t have to put up with an uncomfortable one,” she said. Some of the most movIng scenes in the book are of Sarah, driving a car with a teenage passenger, encouraging her to talk about a problematic relationship.
A publishing nightmare
When Batchelder decided she had to get the book published, she attended an online workshop, When Words Count, where she got feedback on the manuscript and on marketing. As testament to the workshop’s name, she ended up cutting 69,000 words. “And the book is better for it,” she said.
Batchelder has a tale of woe and warning about getting a book published. More than a year ago, she connected with Publishing Pros, which looked like it was part of Amazon. They said she would keep all the rights to the book after they published it. “We’ll keep you posted,” they assured her. After two months she received a “long, scrolling, PDF” with lots of errors, such as “funky spacing,” and font changes. She was unable to do any edits on the document and instead had to write notes about changes. Months went by during which she was working full time and distracted by personal issues.
In November she told them she had to see something. They sent back what “looked like a telephone book, with no margins.” They said they’d fix it. Finally, in February she looked them up and realized they were not part of Amazon; “It was a scam.” They did give back the money she had paid, but now it was almost a year later. This past February she sent a reformatted manuscript to “the real Amazon.” She got a corrected version back in early April.
Batchelder had chosen the book’s title early on. There is a reference in the book to “a coin spinning on end.” The uncertainty of its outcome reflects the way the plot of the book unfolds. It also seems a metaphor for Sarah, who for a long time is confused and searching for answers. For the cover of the book, designed with the help of Maggie Smith, a longtime Harvard friend and artist, Batchelder found an image online and got permission to use it from a woman who lives in England—it’s Sarah, up on end and spinning.
Batchelder will talk about the book at Fivesparks on Saturday, June 29, at 4 p.m. Copies of the book will be for sale.
