After 25 years of running Friendly Crossways at 247 Littleton County Road as a hostel, retreat for nonprofit groups, and wedding venue, Mary Helan Vesenka Turner and Keith Turner have put the business up for sale. Sitting on the porch of the old farmhouse, looking out at the 15 acres of lawn, woodland, blueberry bushes, fruit trees, vegetable garden, rows of sunflowers, and acres of cornfield, I found it hard to imagine how they could leave this piece of Eden. But it is also easy to see how much physical work and emotional energy it takes to run and maintain such a property.
The shutdown during the first year of the pandemic gave the Turners an opportunity to do some things they’d been putting off—among them a new potable water system, new windows in the dining room and kitchen space that connects the private five-bedroom farmhouse to the large barn, and a new entrance door. The facility is in top-notch condition, says Keith, and the business is thriving. “It’s almost as though Friendly Crossways is telling us it’s time to go.” Mary Helan adds, “We’ve taken Friendly Crossways pretty much as far as we want to go, and now we realize it’s time for someone else to step in who will carry on the legacy with their own enthusiasm, energy, and vision.” Both agree they are ready to move on to a new adventure.
A child of the Crossways
Mary Helan says it has taken her five years to even think about selling and moving away from Harvard. She grew up at Friendly Crossways, which her parents took over in the early 1960s from the Barretts, a Quaker couple who had purchased the farm in 1947 and turned it into a hostel and retreat center. One of the first things her parents did was to put in heat so the facility could be open year-round. Mary Helan’s dad was a teacher, and he worked during the summers converting the barn into private bedrooms. Following Mary Helan on a tour of the huge barn, going up and down stairways, looking into bedrooms, walking through a large communal living room, seeing the dorm in what was once a chicken coop, was exhausting. It was hard to imagine also cleaning the rooms and changing the sheets on all the beds we passed.
Helping on the farm, welcoming people from all over the world, learning to cook from her mom—all prepared Mary Helan to take over the business, although she was off having adventures for 20 years before she did so. She met and married Keith in Hawaii. When her parents told her they were selling, but as yet had no buyer, Mary Helan and Keith had a family meeting with their three children, and they all agreed they wanted to move to Harvard and save the property from a developer. They were ready to put a lot of energy, work, and love into the business, carrying on from where Mary Helan’s parents had left off. They looked forward to the flexible lifestyle, growing their own food, and having their children grow up on a farm and interact with all sorts of people. “The world came to our doorstep,” says Mary Helan.
Mary Helan Vesenka Turner and Keith Turner in front of their fields. (Photo by Lisa Aciukewicz)
Of course not everything has been idyllic, but Mary Helan and Keith agree they make a great team. They each have their own strengths. Keith is the one with the vision and Mary Helan figures out how to make it happen. Keith says no matter what idea he comes up with, Mary Helan never says, “No way.” He is a planner, figuring out several alternative scenarios if Plan A doesn’t work, and he admires Mary Helan, who is confident things will go well, and if they don’t, she can problem solve. “Mary loves doing the impossible at the last minute,” says Keith. They both love to host. Mary Helan grew up following her mother’s example. Keith grew up in Georgia with the famous Southern hospitality, and, like the classic innkeeper, Keith has the gift of storytelling.
“We’ve been dependent on the kindness of strangers,” says Mary Helan. Over the years they have had volunteers—from college dropouts to Ph.D.s—from the World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms (WWOOF) program, where the young people work for room and board. “They’ve been enthusiastic learners, and it’s been fun to mentor them and share our expertise,” says Mary Helen.
The terrible ice storm of 2008 had a silver lining for the Turners. They lost 40 old fir trees from the forest behind the farmhouse. A tree crew from New Hampshire came with equipment to help Harvard with the cleanup, and the workers stayed at Friendly Crossways. In exchange for room and board, they offered to clean up the property, and in the process, they opened up a beautiful glade behind the house. Keith asked if they could move a few boulders, as he envisioned a fireplace in this location. He says they not only made a circle of boulders—“setting each one down as though settling a bowling ball in a nest of eggs”—but they also made a stone wall and steps from one level to another. This proved to be a perfect site for a wedding ceremony, with the setting sun as a backdrop.
Having the ideal venue and an expanding presence on social media led to an increase in weddings at Friendly Crossways. They have had as many as 18 weddings in one year. Everything is right here and the wedding party and lots of guests can stay the weekend. Initially Mary Helan did the catering, but as business grew, she hired a caterer. “We had to go through a whole lot of catering frogs to get the right one,” says Mary Helan. Every wedding has a glitch, says Keith. “Our job is to make sure the bride and groom never know; it has to appear flawless.” It is their joy to make other people happy, says Keith.
They really haven’t had any Godzilla brides, they agree. The Friendly Crossways venue is self-selective, and its rustic chic attracts mostly flexible people who can let go of the dream of a perfect wedding. This isn’t to say things are without drama. Keith says he often hears Mary Helan’s side of a phone conversation with a hysterical bride on the other end. She’s like a wedding therapist, he says. Mary Helan says her most assuring line to the worried bride is, “This may be your first wedding, but it’s not ours.”
A plan for what comes next
As wonderful as the property is and as much as he enjoys things like picking a ripe plum as he rides past on the mower, Keith says he is finding it more and more tiring to keep up with the day-to-day maintenance. But they both love people, and neither of them can imagine doing nothing, so they have a definite plan. They own a catamaran that they keep at a marina in Georgia, and with their combined expertises as captain and chef, they plan to run six charters a season, December to June, to the Bahamas for groups of about four people for a week at a time. Yes, there will still be hard work, but for Keith it will be going from 10,000 square feet to 800 square feet to take care of, and Mary Helan will be making four beds instead of 60 and cooking for far fewer people than as many as 160 at a time.
Still, it will be a bittersweet parting. Friendly Crossways has been so much a part of Harvard’s history. “So much good stuff has come out of here,” says Mary Helan. There have been fundraisers here, storytelling, Garden Club workshops, meetings for various town groups, and gatherings for friends. Keith talks of the Friendly Crossways miracle, and he says there have been many examples.
He tells about how, when they had just taken over, an organization wanted to have a two-week camp at the facility. They were going to pay good money, but they wanted a lot of work done—a baseball diamond upgraded and a volleyball court installed. And there was only one week to do everything. Keith bought posts and ordered 80 bags of concrete and three loads of gravel. He was planning to rent some heavy equipment. The day he was set to begin, a guy appeared at the door—6 feet 4 inches, no shirt, cockney accent—who had walked more than 3 miles from the Littleton train station. He asked if he could work for room and board. Oh, and he happened to be a mason. When Keith told him he was planning to rent a backhoe, the man answered, “Ya got a wheelbarrow and a shovel?” Underscoring this example of the Friendly Crossways miracle, Keith says, “We have a need, and it walks in the door.”
They have a need now, and they believe a miracle couple will appear and carry on the legacy. “We were the miracle couple for my parents, who were the miracle couple for the Barretts, who had been a miracle couple for the farmer,” says Mary Helan.
