Black Friday, Cyber Monday, Toys R Us catalogues the size of encyclopedias (remember those?), Santa Claus … the holiday season isn’t sensory overload just for adults. Kids as young as one get sucked into the frenzy by being placed in Santa’s lap and told to make a wish. So many parents struggle with teaching their children that there is more to the holiday season than “stuff.”
How do you teach kids to be mindful of those less fortunate in a culture of excess? How does a mom compete with Elsa and Anna dolls and 4-foot-tall Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle action figures? How do you teach selflessness to adolescents who are still trying to figure out how to be separate and independent from mom and dad?
Ask for and give the gift of time
Beginning with Thanksgiving Day, there are many ways to emphasize the giving spirit of this time of year. Instead of handing off the kids’ wish list to family and friends, ask for and give the opportunity to interact with loved ones. Encourage aunts and uncles to take your kids on a nature walk one afternoon or come build snow forts. Offer to have your nieces and nephews over for an afternoon of play dough molding and puzzle building. Loved ones live far away? Schedule a Skype date. Let the kids choose silly outfits and dance in front of the computer for Grandma for half an hour. Make a poster board of magazine clippings and play “I Spy” via Skype with cousins. Help your preschooler put on a play or sing a song that can be recorded and sent to family and friends. Add costumes, special lighting—as in extra lamps or flashlights—background music; get creative! Not only are you giving the gift of time, but you are also getting it by creating priceless memories with your child.
Interact with your community
Harvard is a small town, offering children the opportunity to see just how important their contribution to our community can be: They can see the joy on our neighbors’ faces when we make the effort to focus our kids on giving rather than receiving. Looking for a way to brighten someone’s day? Make a batch of cookies with your kids and bring them to one of the Council on Aging (COA)’s Tuesday or Thursday noon luncheons at Hildreth House. Not good in the kitchen? Teach your kids a few carols and bring them to lunch to sing to the seniors. Get a group together to do the baking or singing. Debbie Thompson, director of Harvard’s COA, is happy to have any involvement from Harvard youngsters. Contact her at 978-456-4120 to schedule your visit.
Give to those in need
Need to clear out space for the toys that are bound to arrive via sleigh or post? Ask your children to help put together a box of gently used toys to pass on to other kids who aren’t as fortunate. You’d be surprised by the enthusiasm expressed by many preschoolers when they are asked to give away toys to kids who might not have any of their own. Sometimes the challenge can be getting the child to put a cherished teddy back in the bed and not in the box. Though the enthusiasm is endearing, don’t get caught with a meltdown at bedtime because his or her lovey is on the curb! There are many organizations that will collect your donation right from your home. Schedule a pick-up with the Epilepsy Foundation (www.donatenewengland.org), Vietnam Veterans of America (www.scheduleapickup.com/home), or the Big Brother Big Sister Foundation of Boston (www.bbbsfoundation.org/donationpickup).
This Thanksgiving, as you say thanks for the family and friends in your lives, take time to also express your gratitude for the wonderful food you are fortunate to consume. Make a special shopping trip with your young one to donate to Loaves & Fishes, the local food pantry in Devens serving Harvard and nearby communities. A list of their most needed items can be found at www.loavesfishespantry.org/donate/needed-items.
You don’t have to go head-to-head with Santa to instill a sense of community and selflessness in your child. After all, Saint Nicholas, the Greek bishop who died sometime in the mid-fourth century, was best known for giving gifts to the poor. The man behind the beard and patron saint of children was made famous for his selflessness and community spirit. He would definitely add your kids to the “nice” list for participating in any of the above acts of kindness.
