My first three weeks of college at Johns Hopkins have been both invigorating and tiring. My transformation from a Trojan, class of 2013, to a Blue Jay, class of 2017, has easily become one of the most significant changes in my life thus far.
Freedom
When thinking about the college experience, the one word that comes to mind is freedom. Freedom to pick not just my classes but what time they are, with what professors, and on what days of the week. I have the freedom to choose a friend group that fits my particular preferences, simply because my class size has bumped up tenfold from 120 to 1,200. Chef Paul’s food is great, but the numerous restaurant options in Baltimore have turned lunch from a scheduled 30-minute block to a long adventure on Charles Street.
The change from a regimented “get up at 6:30 a.m. and go to school ’til 2:20 p.m.” to a loose “if you miss your lecture, your professor won’t even know” mentality has truly illustrated how much freedom I have as a college student. I don’t feel like a kid anymore, but rather an adult capable of making independent and thoughtful (or not-so-thoughtful) decisions.
Let’s not forget that this freedom can easily be taken to extremes. You can sleep through your classes, hit the frats during the school week, and neglect your homework. You can spend your four years in whatever way you want; it’s completely up to you.
Reinvention
One of my absolute favorite parts of college is that everyone has the chance to reinvent themselves. As it stands, the Bromfield culture is not the most conducive environment for self-expression. In a homogeneous community with a relatively small number of students, there is a limit to the variety of friendships, romantic relationships, academic courses, and extracurricular activities that a student can participate in. Naturally, this limits students’ abilities to express themselves in exactly the way they would like to, as the environment simply limits the possibilities.
In contrast, in just three weeks, I’ve been exposed to more nationalities, cultures, academic, and extracurricular opportunities, and social events than in the entirety of my four years at Bromfield. I get to choose from an enormous range of opportunities and truly pursue what I love. I can be whatever “me” I want to be.
So far, I’ve asked people to call me Seal, thus finally ending the Bin-Ben conundrum whenever I meet someone new. I’m rushing the business fraternity, working a research team leader position at the medical school, and building a tech start-up with other entrepreneurs. I feel like a new person—and I love it.
Enjoying learning
I enjoy every single one of my classes. From Principles of Marketing to Foundations of Brain, Behavior, and Cognition, the classes feel more like TedTalks than hour-long lectures. My professors all have incredible backgrounds, which makes every class far more engaging. Still, it’s definitely a lot more work than I anticipated. I spent last Saturday night in the Brody Learning Commons just trying to catch up from a week of academic pummeling. Although at face value that might sound horrible, being intellectually challenged in an interesting subject is really invigorating. (I think the quadruple espresso shot coffee likely plays a role, too.)
Missing Mom
The college experience has been incredible and far better than I pictured it to be these first several weeks. Yet, there are aspects of high school that I do miss dearly. I miss the personal interactions with my teachers, as now three out of my five professors don’t even know my name. I miss my room, as my un-air-conditioned dorm room feels smaller and smaller every day. I miss having family dinners. I miss Nick George and my other crazy friends. I miss my mom. Adjusting to all these changes at once has definitely been difficult, and I still don’t think I’ve completely normalized from such a significant shift in my life. That will hopefully come with time.
I still have so many questions and so few answers. Where do I want to be in five years? Do I have time for this or that? What do I want out of life? Clearly, the answers won’t come all at once, but slowly discovering them one by one is what growing up is all about.
Seal Bin Han is a 2013 graduate of the Bromfield School and a freshman at Johns Hopkins University.
